Saturday, June 30, 2012

Struggling

The last few weeks I have been struggling with how my life is turning out.  My heart just cannot grasp that I am divorced.  It was never a word in my vocabulary and never would it ever happen to me and my husband.  Never.

Not only do I have the big "D" tattooed on my forehead, I struggle with D not having a mommy and daddy under the same roof; D having a mommy and daddy who love each other and laugh with each other.  How could this be the route my life has taken?

Self pity, Party of One!  Self pity, Party of One. 

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Take it from a kid who has been there. It is MUCH better to be raised with your parents in different homes where they are both happy than one where they can't stand each other and scream and fight and stress the kids out all the time. I wish my parents had divorced when I was little instead of waiting. We could've all been a lot happier. I'm sorry you are struggling. I can't imagine the pain of going through a divorce. I will continue to pray for you. But you seem like you're a great mom to D and really try to work with your ex to be civil and that is what will be most important to D.

Paige Mayhair

Erin said...

I think the thing here is that you can't let the divorce define who you are. You know what I mean? Just like you couldn't let infertility become you. I know that is easier said than done, and I absolutely know that your perfect plan didn't look like this. I am praying for God to give you encouragement as you seek a new vision.

Janny said...

Life doesn't always work out the way we planned Lisa, you are a great mommy to D and it's better for him to have a happy smiling mommy and daddy who live separately than a fighting crying mommy and daddy living together (my parents divorced when I was 7, I'm speaking from personal experience).
It is hard but you will get through this, you're a strong woman.

Mandy Babb said...

I think it IS important to remember: life doesn't always turn out how we thought it would. I'm learning that as well, in a different way. That sweet boy has two parents who love him, and that's awesome!! I don't doubt that it's hard though. I really cannot imagine what life would be like if I was doing it alone. You are a strong woman and it makes me want to learn to be stronger!

cagrlasu said...

I agree with Mandy and all of the other comments. Life never turns out the way we thought but it does have a way of working out in the end. During the present it's hard to accept the situation. You are an amazing mommy and an amazing and strong person. Look at all you have been through. I know things seem tough right now but it will get better. Sending you hugs.