Monday, November 14, 2011

Bad Dreams...

Random Post, sorry.

Most of the time I have fun, very detailed, dreams; but sometimes, I have a really bad, really real nightmare.  Ya know, NOT the ones of the Scream killer coming and chasing me like I'm in a very bad horror flick...I have the ones that are real (D getting kidnapped...D getting beaten by a day care center...etc.).

Well, I don't have them a lot, maybe 5 a year...however, lately, I have had them more frequently.  This one woke me up about 20 minutes ago and I have been unable to go back to sleep.

Long dream was sort of like the movie 2012.  The huge tidal waves were coming in and there was not a thing you could do but sit and watch and pray that the massive, violent waves didn't sweep you away.  My immediate family and I (+ D) had found out and we began preparing as best we could.  We made our way through the "city" streets trying to find "something' (but looking back on the dream...all we could do was watch the impending doom).  Anyway, we walked through all the corridors and hallways, which all looked the same, we were trying to find the beach ????  I truly don't know why.  To protect the innocent, one of my family members who was holding D some how locked him in my old pastor's office without me knowing.  We made it to the beach and we were watching the waves get bigger and bigger and I kept ask what D was doing and I realized he wasn't "sleeping" where my family member said he was...I panicked and the family member just cried because they didn't want D to see all the chaos and terror.  After they told me where he was, I frantically searched through all the hallways trying to find that office.  I did find it but it was locked and I, again, panicked.

I was able to get him out and we did manage to escape the first devastating waves that hit us but the bad news lurking around was that we were not out of the danger zone...more waves were to come.

I'm sure it has to do with me being a single parent now and the responsibility of keeping D alive and safe, etc.  Not only are my dreams very detailed and real...I FEEL my dreams.  I feel the terror and the hopelessness.  I feel my pounding heart and the tears.  I feel the horrible flip flop of your stomach when you realize the fate of your story.  UGH....thus me being awake now.

Gonna go try to get some sleep now.  At least I got to love on the kitty a bit and the dogs got a pee break.  Sigh.  D is just dreaming away...not a care in the world.  Thank you, Lord!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

There was a time when I had recurring wave dreams. Tsunami type waves. They'd always crash over me, but I'd never get hurt or swept away. A Christian counselor told me it probably represented that I was feeling very overwhelmed but the fact that I never got hurt meant my spirit felt secure in God's protection over me.

I know exactly that terror you are describing. Praying peaceful rest for you.