Thursday, January 27, 2011

Guilty

I'm sorry I've been a bad blogger. We have had several bad days in January. We have had three deaths in the family. My Uncle, my Great Aunt and Matt's grandma. All within 2 weeks. It's been a long January.

I look at D's sweet face and my heart can't even take it. It is a feeling that I never knew existed. I know what happy feels like...I know what sadness feels like...I know what anger feels like...you get the picture, but this feeling of looking in D's angel face? There is no word to describe it.

He is the most awesome thing that has ever come into my life. His big ol' eyes just make my heart skip a beat. His smile is contagious. He is so happy. He smiles and coos and says "hey!" all the time. He never cries. Seriously. He smiles all the time. He wakes me up by just grunting a little and when I look in his bed he just looks up at me and his mouth is grinning so big his dimples just crack his face!

I feel so guilty about going back to work. I know people do it all the time but my heart almost can't take it. I go back on Monday and I pray my heart doesn't break in two. He brings me more joy than I could explain.

He is 12 weeks today. 12!! I will post pictures this weekend and update more frequently, I promise.

1 comment:

Ashley said...

Will be thinking of you on Monday. Hope you have a really great weekend with little D. Sorry to hear about your losses, what a crappy January!