Friday, January 01, 2010


It seems literally impossible that it is the year 2010. I realized last night that I have lived in FIVE different decades...FIVE! 70's, 80's, 90's, 00's, and now the 10's...which seems weird to type. What will we call this decade...the teens? the tens?

I am ready to close the book on 2009. This new decade will bring so many things. I am ready for the next new thing. I am ready to start this new year with the last round of fertility. I am ready to get some finality on this crazy chapter.

I spent an hour or so re-reading some of my posts from when I first started this blog. I have had to live up to what I so bravely revealed what I "would do" if something happened (i.e., pregnancy, miscarriage, no baby out of that round). It has been hard. 2009 was more bitter than sweet. The sweetest thing that happened was hearing that little one's heart beat. The rest of the year was hard core sadness and struggle. Blah blah blah...cue the violins.

But the one thing that has been constant has been knowing AND feeling God's loving arms holding me and loving me. He was always reassuring me and reminding me that everything was going to be OK. OK in the sense of Him always being there and walking me through this life...and sometimes carrying me through this life.

So no matter what 2010 and the coming years may bring...I know I still have that constant with me. Thank you, Lord!

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