Tuesday, September 01, 2009

Heaven is much sweeter now...

I am heartbroken to say that the doctor could not find a heartbeat today. The baby was only measuring 7 weeks 1 day...I am supposed to be 9 weeks 1 day.

I am overwhelmed with emotion right now and my heart is raw. I have peace that God knows what He is doing; however, it doesn't mean the pain isn't devastating.

I am waiting on a call from the doc to schedule a DNC. We may beat him to the punch because I am spotting pretty heavily now.

His thoughts are higher than mine. There is a bigger purpose for this little one. It doesn't mean I am not completely heartbroken though.

Little one is at peace and is safely with his creator...he is in much better hands than what I could have given him but I would have loved to have tried...

24 comments:

lmashe81 said...

You guys are in our thoughts and prayers!

Denasgifts said...

My heart totally breaks for you.I have been there 3 times and it never gets easier. Please let me know if I can do anything for you. I am here if you need to talk. Much love!!

Yael said...

I wish I could help ease your pain. I'm thinking of you and Matt.

Anonymous said...

I love you both and will continue to pray. I'm here if you need ANYTHING.

Sus

Anonymous said...

I am a friend of Charity's and have been following your blog since she asked for prayer for you at the beginning of your pregnancy.

I just wanted to say I'm praying for you for healing and continued peace as well as strength.

Anonymous said...

Lisa-
I am so sorry for your loss. Some things in life seem so unfair!!! You guys will continue to be in my prayers. May God give you peace during this difficult time.
Cindy Lemley

hainesbaby said...

i'm so sorry lisa. wish i knew what to say that would take your pain away,but.... i know you have a strong relationship with the Lord just listen to him and he will ease your pain. again i'm very sorry.

love
sunnye

Karen said...

Lisa,

I can't even imagine what you are feeling right now! I so wish you could have held your little one but you WILL someday . . the wait is hard, though!

Thank you for sharing your journey with all of us . . you have such a sweet heart and we love you and will continue to be your prayer warriors.

Standing in the gap today for you!

Karen

Aimee said...

Hey Lisa,
I am so so sorry for you loss. I know how painful this is. I too miscarried with my first one. It ia a huge loss and hard to comprehend. There are no words that can make this better, just hold tight to Jesus, and he will see you though.

Aimee

Debbie Lesley said...

Oh Lisa, I wish there were words to say that could truly help you, but I know there are none. You know there are many of us with you today in thoughts, prayers, and yes, with tears. Your faith is admirable and strong and will carry you through this even when you ask why. Much North Carolina love to you and all your wonderful family.

Debbie

Just Jiff said...

I'm so, so, so sorry. My heart is breaking for you.

*HUGS*

Meredith Krisell said...

Yes, heaven is much sweeter, but I know your pain is not. I will continue to pray for you and Matt. There is no doubt in my mind that you will make it through. It does take time and with God's help you will make it. Love you!

Anonymous said...

I am sorry for the loss of your sweet baby. Praying for you and all of your family as I know a loss like this is devestating to all inolved. Keep your eyes on the cross...

florence said...

Lisa/Matt...

I am so so sorry. Continually lifting you in prayer and here if you need anything......won't even try to say anything else as it wouldn't be adequate to help...love you so much

Sean and Lendy said...

my precious friend...i am so sorry you are having to walk this road. know that you are loved and prayed for.

Ginger O said...

So sorry, Lisa and Matt!

Clair Mays said...

I've been praying and I'll keep praying for you all. You're a warrior. Keep fighting!

Tim and Leslie said...

Lisa, I am so sorry for your loss. Please know that you are in our thoughts and prayers. God is not done with you guys!

Cindy Wofford said...

I have a baby that was 5 weeks gestation while I was 7 weeks and he or she is in heaven with yours. My heart breaks for you. He would be 18 years old now and I am still sad when I think about him. Love you. My prayers are with you.

Anonymous said...

Lisa, I'm So Sorry
Nikki

Anonymous said...

"I do not know why oft 'round me,
My hopes all shattered seem to be;
God's perfect plan I cannot see,
But someday I'll understand.
Someday He'll make it plain to me,
Someday when I His face shall see;
Someday from tears I shall be free,
For someday I shall understand."

I found this on a web page as I was praying and thinking about you, baby brown, Matt and all those who love you. I know that in a time such as this that few words can comfort your sorrow. I want to remind you what an inspiration you have been to me in your strength during your journey over the last several weeks and months. I am sure that God has given you the ability to share your story with all who will read it and they know that you are a true child of His! I love you my friend. Find your quite place where God can inspire you to continue your journey no matter where the road may lead. Even the best poets know that taking the road less traveled offers an adventure worth taking!

Christy

becca said...

I didn't want to comment b/c "I am so sorry" sounds so tiny compared to what you are going through. I *am* sorry and my heart aches for you, but I can't even begin to understand. I can imagine and THAT hurts, but it isn't reality.
I am praying for you.

Paige said...

I'm so sorry Lisa but as your words so graciously put it. His ways are higher than ours! I know it doesn't make it ok and easier but the knowledge that your baby is in the hands of his maker is divine! My prayers are with you all!

Christy said...

Matt/Lisa,

This was very hard for me to hear.
My heart hurts for you as well!!! I pray that God will lift your broken hearts up and give you peace. Stay strong.

Love,
Christy Lute