Sunday, September 06, 2009

After shocks...

I guess my uterus is having some after shocks. I have had some major cramping today. I haven't had a period since January so I am a little unsure what is cramping or what is constipation pain, but I started passing clots and bleeding.

I called Dr. B on the after hours line and he immediately called back. Bless his heart, he had my file right in front of him. He said it probably wasn't my period and it was normal to clot some and bleed. He said it would probably last for a couple of days and then I would start for real later in the month. I still see him on Wednesday for a follow up.

I have felt guilty since losing the baby because I didn't suffer any physical pain. I would have done anything or gone through any kind of pain to spare that baby any pain. And, I didn't have any pain. I went straight from an ultrasound to a D&C with no physical pain. I have had some minor cramping and bloating...but nothing to equate the mental anguish that I am feeling.

So, I have felt guilty...I feel somewhat better that I am having some mild to severe helps my mental state...don't ask me why.

I think my baby boys (Dexter, Zach & Tobey) have some kind of "plan" to watch me at all times. I burst into tears last night for no reason and Zach immediately was in my face licking all the tears that were falling. I will walk into the other room and I will hear "click click click" and Tobey will be right on my heels. Dexter just takes the shift where he can stay under the covers and lie next to me. LOL. He is such the fat boy...

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I had a miscarriage also and a couple days after my D&C I had really bad cramps and started bleeding clots also. I called my doc and spoke to a nurse and she told me that my uterus had expanded and the cramping was my body returing to the pre pregnancy state. I had a hard time with that, but she did say it was a good sign because the sooner that happened the sooner we could try again. I feel your pain and wish there where words to make it better, but there just arent. I hope this might have heelped you in some way, know that we are all pulling for you and praying for you as well!! xoxo